Fast & Furious Food

GM 🐦 

Here's your daily dose of Andrew's Apples, a small white bag of four fresh *fruits* to nourish your soul and make you feel great. In under 2 minutes. Let's go picking.

1. 🍟 Fast & furious food. America exports two things mainly: the US Dollar and Culture (both the cool Brooklyn kind and the fast food kind). No need to wax poetic on fast food (lots of ink already spilt), read more here and here on how it's literally addictive and tightly tied to metabolic disease. Growing up I used to think the McDonald's PlayPlace was a mecca for celebration, joy, and good eats. I now know it for what it is: a farting room. More on f*rts in upcoming Issues, gang.

2. 🍩 Sugarcoated. The sugar industry is a *sick* bastard, namely because they are good at what they do: pitch one thing and sell you something different. A 2016 study looked at the links between sugar and diabetes/obesity; of the 60 studies, the 24 which did NOT find a link were ALL funded by the (sugary) beverage industry. I'm no brain surgeon but. They're clever about it too - 74% of packaged food contains added sugar, and usually under "low key" pseudonyms like barley malt and rice syrup. Lies, lies, lies. Mere hippie talk for one of the four white devils. Avoid like the plague.

3. 🤯 Stress mark. It's been shown that stress shows up as physical pain (neck, chest, and stomach, mostly). Cortisol, the stress hormone, is released when you get "stressed," and in high quantities cortisol then manifests in pain. The pain leads to poor sleep which leads to more stress and the hellish carousel spins 'round. Not to mention the weight gain associated with extended periods of stress. Remedies for stress are older than the written word: get outside, move, drink obscene amounts of water/electrolytes, rest. It's ok: hearing how a tween sold a picture of a rock for $2 million on the internet makes us ALL feel the weight of the world. Just don't get into a world of hurt.

4. 🍦 The Cool Hauswrecker. So there's this popular ice cream called Cool Haus. It tastes good, sports funky millennial branding, the whole thing. It's also banned in the EU, but not here in the US (classic). The dessert contains titanium dioxide which, aside from sounding like a performance enhancing drug, causes DNA damage. Its nanoparticles are so small that they accumulate in the lungs, liver, and kidneys. The front of the package audaciously boasts its "Clean Ingredients" lmao. Welcome to BananaLand.

How do you like them Apples? Any bad ones? Suggestions? If you ever need anything, hit reply. 

Your friend, 

Andrew 🍎 

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